I hope they never get tired of me.

I hope they never get tired of me.

I know I can be a heavy burden and emotionally draining at times. I carry too much emotional baggage and I tend to pour out on people. I am so grateful for those who stood by me through those times. A listening ear can be a big hug for me. But sometimes, I can’t help but feel guilty for speaking up and asking for help. I hope someone would care but when someone would actually do, I tend to reject the care they are giving in fear of being a burden.

I also love my people, those people that I genuinely love and care for. I want them close but I also hesitate in getting attached so I tend to ignore them. And for those whom I am already attached with, I tend to push them away when I feel like they’re going to leave.

I hope for help but refuse and feel guilty for it when it comes.

I ask for attention but I despise it when it is given.

I like to keep my loved ones but I also push them away.

I want to receive love but I find myself hard to love.

To those who are still patient with me, thank you. I’m trying my best to change… to be better for you and for myself.

I hope you never get tired of me.